Yesterday our clinical psychologist got a hint of the anger/angry states that are in this mind.
With the craziness over the last few days Sophie ended up calling the Mental Health Crisis Line. They always start off with wanting to know your name, address and phone number – well she could do the name and address, but with us changing our phone numbers so recently to the confidential ones she couldn’t remember them. Instead of the “nice” crisis line worker saying something like “Oh have you got them written down somewhere that you can check”, she said “well how are the CAT team going to contact you?” Now you can quite rightly call us crazy, but when someone calls a crisis line, they’re strangely enough IN A CRISIS… Their thinking is altered… Their logic off kilter… So you can’t expect them to think through how to get those numbers. So Sophie just thanked her for her help and hung up – yes even in a crisis she’s polite 🙂
So fast forward to yesterday, we get a text from our clinical psychologist asking if we were ok… we were for once honest and said “No”! She said that the CAT team had contacted her because they were concerned about us, and so was she… Well that was not such a good thing to say when we’d been asking for her help for the last month, and the psychiatrist she recommended had been slack with our medication! So Frank decided it was time to tell the clinical psychologist something! Frank is a rather angry part that often comes forward when we’re in hospitals and when our defences are weak. His main language is swearing, with the occasional noun thrown in just to connect the swear words…
Problem is we all have amnesia for when Frank is present. So we just lost the afternoon. The thing that made us realise that he’d sent a text was that the phone settings had been changed – he likes using capitals! So after a rather frantic search we found the honest, but not diplomatic text he sent 😦 This meant we had to apologise to her for the language… It’s still our brain doing it so it’s still our responsibility to try and fix.
Will be interesting to see what happens when we have our appointment with her on Friday – more than a little worried about it!