So another Christmas is over… it’s now 1am on the 26th of December.
We did some really positive things on Christmas Day –
- We cooked a meal that involved touching raw meat – we’re not vegetarians, but have issues about touching raw meat. We think it’s because the father was a butcher and some abuse occurred at his work.
- We talked to the oldest brother on the phone, we dissociated to a younger part, but we managed to stay on the phone.
- We told the mother that we weren’t comfortable with her giving out our confidential phone number to the Aunt who was stupid enough to address our Christmas card to our married name – we never used the ex-husbands last name. This is also the Aunt who still talks to the father – she has more than a few issues!
- We talked to our friend in England and got teased unmercifully about our accent.
This friend doesn’t know the first thing about dissociation, but he has this amazing ability to know when it’s going to happen. If we’re talking through IM he just suddenly stops messaging… often he can spot the change in our language and tone before we do. On the phone he spots it and depending on what happens will either tell me to hang up and go for a walk or get a cup of tea or just keep talking through it to see if the talking will bring us back.
He doesn’t care about it. He just carries on being the rather laid back, level headed guy that he is. His only comment is that he is sorry for what happened to us. We sent him the INSiDE clip to try and explain what happens in this head. He’s now going to research it – he’s a teacher who did psychology as his undergraduate degree. He’s the first person who isn’t a survivor that we’ve told anything about the dissociation to. It was sort of thrown at him as he triggered us badly the first time we ever talked to him – he asked how we got on with the father… Unfortunately the ones who were looking for a fight came forward and tried to bait him.
So another Christmas is over…
Just the New Year to go…