Not invisible

We’re not invisible.  We did a set on Polyvore called Layers and people are adding it to their favourites.  W is going crazy… she’s screaming for us to be invisible again.  She was the one who had most of the input into the set, she thought it was awful and ugly and disgusting.  She can’t just take it down, because other people have commented on it now, if you remove it they’ll think we’re crazy.  It will look like we’re attention seeking, and she doesn’t want any attention from anyone.

Need to be invisible.
No one can hurt if you’re invisible.
No one can hurt you if you’re not there.

She was wanting to self-injure, but did the set instead.  It eased the need to hurt, but the result of the mild attention caused by the set has triggered her through the roof.  She did something really positive as a coping strategy, and the result ended up with a bigger trigger than the original urge…

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16 thoughts on “Not invisible

  1. Polyvore is one of the few sites where there are no privacy options. What’s worse is that several people have commented on how creepy the set is. W is 8 and highly literate. How do you explain to an 8 year old that something they created to get some terrible feelings out is positive when several people have said that it’s creepy?

    None of the people commenting would have any idea what the impact of their words are. There is a description underneath the set which details that this represents our self-disgust and a feeling of dirtiness, but people rarely read descriptions.

    We’re just going to curl up on the couch and try to forget the world for a little bit 🙂

    Thank you…

  2. I know. Its such a tug of war to explain to beautiful little child that their emotions are valid, when people who don’t even read the descriptions say they’re creepy.

    Sitting besides you, offering understanding.

  3. Hi W

    It’s me – another invisible one – talking to you and I would like to say to you I know how hard is to listen to people – who can’t understand us – talking nonsense about ourselves.

    Because they don’t know what they are doing/saying, I am apologizing to you on their behalf.

    And I’d like to offer you a tip to make other people unable to talk nonsense again, ok? So, next time here are three steps you can do to make them unable to talk nonsense:

    step One: as soon as you finish you collage, make a printscreen of it and delete it from the polyvore site;
    step Two: save the printscreen and put it on your blog,
    step Three: you have all the necessary control over the comments.

    does this make any sense to you, or not? If you don’t know how to make a printscreen, I can teach you, ok?

    me

  4. Yes, I know, my Bold Alter keeps saying to all of us that if were visible then nice people might know to help us, but – like you – I still prefer to stay invisible, because although the Bold Alter is not afraid to punch the Almighty in His face, he still can’t protect us all the time, so we are better silent and invisible.

  5. I just came over from Vague’s blog. I’m sorry about what people said on Polyvore. I just joined at Polyvore and have only done one collage so far. I think I’ve favorited a few of your collages. I think they are profoundly simple yet/and moving and powerful.

    The only group I’ve joined there is the Adult Survivors group. I would think that group would be fairly sensitive, supportive and validating. I hope I’m not wrong.

    I give you great credit for doing the collage rather than self-harming. I know the triggers can kinda multiply and ricochet all over the place. It’s hard to know what to do sometimes. I belong to a couple of groups that I do consider quite supportive, if you want to look at the widgets on my blog. Take gentle care.

  6. Hi Marj aka Thriver,

    Thank you 🙂

    Yes, the Adult Survivors group is a supportive one with some really nice people in it. We were part of the group, but left purely because we were being triggered by the others work – nothing against anyone, it was just too much for us. We stopped adding the sets to any group in an attempt to keep the work private, but for some reason it didn’t work with this particular set.

    What’s interesting/odd is that we all see it quite differently depending on who is up front – some of us don’t see the girls eye, some of us only see the girls eye etc.

    Ohhh we love the fridge you have on your blog – you got a message from Aimee and K on it one day awhile back, I hope you didn’t mind. We tried to put a fridge on this blog, but WordPress does very odd things with the raw html and wouldn’t let us add it.

    Take care…

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