Expressive Arts Carnival: Beach

The beach has always been my retreat… my safe haven. Whenever things got out of control, I drove to the beach. I could look out over the ocean for hours on end, slowly feeling everything internally calm down. It is one of the few places where I can feel peace and a sense of safety.

So, this is my first attempt at the Expressive Arts Carnival hosted by Paul at MindParts. I’ll probably change it when I’m in a better frame of mind; but for now, this is it.

If you’re wondering why I’m posting this now, when everything is so out of control; well it sort of feels like I’ve let the side down by showing my dysfunction and weakness. Like I’m not playing the “game” of being a “survivor”. I realise this is possibly my own expectations coming into play, but there it is…

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13 thoughts on “Expressive Arts Carnival: Beach

  1. Beautiful. The beach is my special place as well. I think it’s great you’re doing something like this when, as you said, “everything is so out of control” – you’re showing what surviving and healing is all about, and doing something nice for yourself as well. If you can’t visit the beach physically, then do it mentally and artistically. Well done! πŸ™‚

  2. it’s beautiful πŸ™‚ i love your thoughts about the beach and what it means to you. and the blue you chose for the wordle. very soothing indeed πŸ™‚

    and i think it’s great you did this while you were feeling so down. it helps me when i’m feeling awful, to remind myself of what brings me comfort. that’s when i need it the most.

    can you get to the beach anytime soon? or simulate it in some way like with a ocean sounds machine in your home? or a beautiful beach poster on your wall? sounds like it’s wonderful for you…

    and by the way, your posts when you write about how you struggle seem like incredible survivor poosts to me. in those posts, you don’t hide your pain, you let the rest of us know how not alone we are, you reach out for support and you seek deeper understanding into your experience. it’s inspiring.

    • Hi Katie,

      I created this using Tagul πŸ™‚ It’s similar to Wordle, but is interactive in that each of the words is linked through to a Google search – I tried to see if I could link it through to a Google image search, but I couldn’t work that out. Something to work on πŸ™‚

      There’s a large, man-made lake in the town where I live, so I often go there when I need to see the water. It’s not the same, but I can usually get some sense of clam there.

      Thank you for understanding. I’m getting comfort from the knowledge that often after a fairly large melt-down, there is a shift in healing… I’m hoping this one is a pretty big shift πŸ™‚

      I was planning to go to the ocean during this past week, but other things got in the way. Maybe tomorrow?

      Thanks again…
      Take care,
      CG

      • thank you, castorgirl πŸ™‚ i appreciate your protective words reinforcing positive self-talk.

        i hope you get to see some water soon. and i’m glad to hear the birthday passed. i hope everything is ok and will get better steadily now. and i’m not sure this is appropriate, or if you’d rather people didn’t, but i feel like wishing you a happy birthday. because i’m glad you are here. i’m just so sorry this time of year is so painful. i hope it gets better in future years.

        • Katie, thank you so much… you have no idea how much I needed to hear the words “Happy birthday”. I didn’t realise until the day of my birthday how neglected and awful I was feeling regarding the birthday and the memories associated with it. If I’m up to it, I’ll write a post about it tomorrow.

          Thank you, you helped me to cry and I really think I needed to.
          Take care,
          CG

  3. i love your word choices. the beach is my “safe place” that i’ve created as part of my therapy. there is a place at mission beach in san diego that i imagine…i wish i lived close enough to a beach to be able to drive there. there is something so beautiful, so calming and soothing about the waves and the sand.

    • Hi Cornnut,

      The beach and ocean is a magical, healing place. There’s something about it that is soothing and healing.

      Thanks for your comment πŸ™‚

      Take care,
      CG

  4. I can’t believe I didn’t make a comment on this!

    I think the reason is that I worried that you felt obligated to do this (what you said at the end about playing the game of being a survivor). I know sometimes when I feel pushed to write about healing words when I am not in a healing place, I often say “Why do this? What’s the point?”

    Looking at the progress you have made lately, makes me think that you are able to find some healing and peace that has alluded you for so long.

    What jumped out at me, was that the words “alone” and “together” were next to each other. I also smiled when I saw the word “safe”.

    Thinking of you…

    • Anything we feel obligated to do, we usually delay. So, there was a need at some level to do this for us, rather than any external force. But, I know what you mean.

      Considering I’ve sat at my desk shaking all day, I’m not quite in the healing, peaceful state that I’d like to be in. But, I’m working on getting there.

      Take care,
      CG

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